Saturday, October 23, 2010

Jokes... For the FIRST TIME ON MY BLOG!!!

I can't believe it. My family is OH SO GOOD at saying jokes.... And I haven't posted any????? Impossible!!! Here, right now, presenting.... *fanfare* Du du du du du duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!!! some jokes! Enjoy!

Cartoonist found dead in home... details are sketchy.

Did you hear about the short fortuneteller who escaped prison? He is now a small medium at large. 

Did you hear about the dog who gave birth by the side of the road? She was cited for littering. 

A blonde police woman pulls over a blonde and says, "Ma'am, you were speeding. May I see your driver's license?"
Flustered, the blonde reaches into her purse and accidentally picks up a hand-mirror and hands it over. The cop looks into the mirror and says, "Oh, I didn't realize you were a police officer. Have a nice day!"

Who was the first person mentioned in the Bible? Chap. 1

When was pork first mentioned in the Bible? When Ham entered the Ark

When was money first mentioned in the Bible? When the dove brought Noah the greenback

Who shared the first date? Adam and Eve

Which three people in the Bible had no parents? Adam, Eve, and Joshua, the son of Nun

A man loses his dog in the woods. How did he find him? By listening to the bark in the trees

How far into the woods can you go? Halfway

What did the pirate say when it was cold outside and he was chopping down a tree? Shiver me timbers! 

How much does a pirate pay to get his ear pierced? A buck-an-ear

Some dead batteries were given out free of charge.

One guy told a second guy that he had a lilac bush six feet tall. What did the second guy say? "I wish I could lie like you." 

Why did the pope cross the road? Because the pope crosses everything!

A cow was sold for some extra moolah. 

Okay, I don't want to run out of jokes (like THAT"S possible!), so I'll write more later. Hope you enjoyed them!


  1. Molly! Those are VERY funny! Do post more! We really liked the pirate ones!!! :D

    Thank you!

  2. No problem. My whole family are pros at making jokes.


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